What I Hope My Son Learns From Watching Me Build

My son has grown up watching me work.

He has seen me answer emails.

Take calls.

Build businesses.

Solve problems.

Work on websites.

Talk about money.

Train people.

Make decisions.

Change plans.

Come home tired.

Start again the next day.

He has seen parts of entrepreneurship that I doubt he fully understands yet.

To him, Denver Dream Medspa is probably not a case study in operations.

Colorado Aesthetics Academy is not a lesson in leadership.

He does not care about revenue, marketing strategy, SEO, payroll, equipment, or margins.

He is a child.

What matters to him is much simpler.

Is Mom here?

Is she listening?

Is she happy?

Can we play?

Can she come?

Did she notice what I made?

And because of that, I think a lot about what he is actually learning by watching me build.

Not what I am intentionally teaching him.

What he is absorbing.

I am Erica Roybal.

I am a mother, entrepreneur, esthetics educator, author, and founder of Denver Dream Medspa and Colorado Aesthetics Academy.

I have spent years building businesses.

But when I think about what I want my son to remember from all of it, very little of it has anything to do with the businesses themselves.

I care much more about the values behind the work.

I Hope He Learns That You Can Build Something From Nothing

I want him to understand that most things do not begin looking impressive.

They begin small.

An idea.

A skill.

A first client.

A first student.

A first website.

A first room.

A first mistake.

A first person who believes in what you are doing.

Then you keep going.

I want him to understand that meaningful things are usually built long before they are visible.

The beginning often looks unimpressive.

That does not mean it is unimportant.

I Hope He Learns That You Do Not Need to Know Everything Before You Start

I have learned so much by doing.

Marketing.

Hiring.

Business finance.

SEO.

Equipment.

Leadership.

Construction.

Operations.

Education.

There were many things I did not know when I started.

If I had waited until I understood every part of entrepreneurship, I probably would have never started.

I want him to know:

You are allowed to learn while you are building.

You should prepare.

You should ask questions.

You should seek expert help when the stakes are high.

But you do not need complete certainty before taking the first step.

I Hope He Learns to Be Resourceful

One of the things entrepreneurship has taught me is that there will always be problems you were not expecting.

You can panic.

You can blame.

You can quit.

Or you can ask:

What can I do next?

That is what I want him to learn.

Not that he will always know the answer.

That he can find one.

Read.

Ask.

Research.

Try.

Adjust.

Get help.

Resourcefulness creates options.

I Hope He Learns That Education Changes Your Options

Education has been an important part of my life.

My path has not been perfectly linear, but education gave me different ways of thinking and different doors I could walk through later.

I want my son to understand that education is not only about getting a degree.

It is about becoming more capable.

You can learn through:

School.

Books.

Mentors.

Experience.

Failure.

Work.

Questions.

I hope he stays curious his entire life.

I Hope He Learns That Women Can Build

This matters deeply to me.

I want my son to grow up seeing women as:

Leaders.

Owners.

Experts.

Educators.

Decision-makers.

People who understand money.

People who create jobs.

People who build companies.

People who take risks.

People who lead teams.

Not as exceptions.

As normal.

I do not want him to think ambition belongs more naturally to men.

I want him to see his mother and simply think:

Of course women can build things.

I Hope He Learns to Respect Ambitious Women

Not be threatened by them.

Not belittle them.

Not expect them to become smaller to make someone else more comfortable.

I want him to respect women who:

Know what they want.

Build careers.

Earn money.

Lead.

Have opinions.

Change their minds.

Create something of their own.

That may be one of the most meaningful things he learns from growing up around my work.

I Hope He Learns That Money Is a Tool

I want him to understand money.

Not worship it.

Not fear it.

Understand it.

Money can create:

Security.

Choices.

Education.

Time.

Opportunity.

Generosity.

But money can also create terrible decisions when people allow it to become the only goal.

I want him to know how to:

Earn.

Save.

Invest.

Ask questions.

Understand debt.

Know what things actually cost.

And distinguish between:

Looking wealthy.

And being financially secure.

Those are not the same thing.

I Hope He Learns That Revenue Is Not Wealth

This is probably not the childhood lesson most mothers think about.

But I hope he understands it one day.

Big numbers can be misleading.

A business can generate a lot and keep very little.

Someone can own expensive things and owe money on all of them.

Someone can appear incredibly successful while feeling financially trapped.

I want him to look deeper.

At business.

At money.

At life.

Not everything impressive from the outside is healthy on the inside.

I Hope He Learns to Live Below the Applause

This may be one of the more important lessons.

Do not build your life around whether other people are impressed.

The bigger business.

The luxury purchase.

The title.

The followers.

The car.

The recognition.

Those things can feel good.

But they are a terrible foundation for your identity.

I want him to be able to ask:

Would I still want this if nobody knew I had it?

That question can save a person from a lot of bad decisions.

I Hope He Learns That Hard Work Matters

I believe in hard work.

I want him to know that.

There are times when you need to:

Stay late.

Practice more.

Study.

Work through frustration.

Do something again because the first attempt was not good enough.

You will not always feel motivated.

Discipline matters.

But I want him to learn something else too.

I Hope He Learns That Hard Work Is Not the Same as Suffering

I do not want him to believe the person who is most exhausted automatically deserves the most success.

There are times when effort is important.

There are also times when:

The system is wrong.

The strategy is wrong.

The price is wrong.

The opportunity is wrong.

Working twice as hard on a bad strategy does not necessarily make it good.

I want him to work hard.

I also want him to think.

I Hope He Learns That Rest Does Not Make You Lazy

This is something I am still learning myself.

The world rewards visible productivity.

It is easy to believe that every hour should be used.

But a person cannot build a meaningful life while permanently exhausted.

I want him to understand that rest can be:

Responsible.

Necessary.

Productive in ways you cannot immediately measure.

You do not have to collapse before you are allowed to stop.

I Hope He Learns That Failure Is Information

I do not want my son to be afraid of failing.

I also do not want to romanticize failure.

Failure can hurt.

It can cost money.

Time.

Confidence.

But when something does not work, there is information there.

Why did it fail?

What assumption was wrong?

What should change?

What would you do differently?

If he learns to ask those questions, failure becomes useful.

I Hope He Sees Me Make Mistakes

Not because I want to make them.

Because I already do.

I do not want him growing up believing adults have everything figured out.

We do not.

I want him to see that a mistake does not have to become your identity.

You can say:

I was wrong.

I should have handled that differently.

I learned something.

I am changing it.

That is strength.

I Hope He Learns to Apologize

Leadership has made this more important to me.

Being the boss does not make you right.

Being the parent does not make you right.

Being older does not make you right.

If I am wrong, I want to be willing to say it.

I hope he learns the same.

A real apology does not make you smaller.

It shows confidence.

I Hope He Learns That Changing Your Mind Is Not Weakness

New information matters.

Experience matters.

Circumstances change.

You should not stay loyal to a bad decision simply because you once defended it.

I want him to be strong enough to say:

I know more now than I did then.

And choose differently.

I Hope He Learns Not to Confuse Stubbornness With Strength

Persistence is valuable.

But there is a difference between:

Not giving up too soon.

And refusing to admit something is not working.

I want him to learn both.

When to continue.

And when to change direction.

That balance takes judgment.

I Hope He Learns to Ask Better Questions

A good question can change everything.

Before buying:

What does this actually cost?

Before signing:

What am I agreeing to?

Before hiring:

What problem does this person solve?

Before trusting:

What evidence do I have?

Before quitting:

Is the problem temporary or structural?

Before saying yes:

What am I saying no to?

I hope he grows into someone who does not accept the easiest answer simply because it is the first one offered.

I Hope He Learns to Read the Contract

This one is absolutely coming from his mother.

Read it.

Do not assume.

Do not rely only on what someone told you.

Ask what happens if:

Things go wrong.

You change your mind.

The other person changes their mind.

Something breaks.

The agreement ends.

You want to leave.

A signature can create obligations long after the conversation is forgotten.

I hope he understands that.

I Hope He Learns That Trust Should Be Earned, Not Given Blindly

I do not want him to become cynical.

I want him to become discerning.

Most people deserve kindness.

Not everyone deserves unlimited access to:

Your money.

Your business.

Your confidence.

Your personal life.

Trust grows through behavior.

Pay attention to what people do.

Not only what they say.

I Hope He Learns to Treat People Well

Employees.

Clients.

Waiters.

Teachers.

Custodians.

Contractors.

Strangers.

People who can help him.

People who cannot.

Character is often clearest in how someone treats a person they do not need anything from.

I hope he remembers that.

I Hope He Learns That Kindness Does Not Mean Having No Boundaries

This is something business taught me.

You can care about people and still say:

No.

That does not work for me.

That behavior is not acceptable.

This agreement needs to change.

This relationship is not healthy.

Being kind does not require becoming easy to take advantage of.

I want him to be both kind and strong.

I Hope He Learns That Leadership Is Service and Responsibility

Leadership is not:

Getting to tell everyone what to do.

It means being responsible for outcomes other people may never see.

It means:

Making decisions.

Creating clarity.

Taking accountability.

Having difficult conversations.

Protecting people.

Setting standards.

I want him to respect leadership enough not to chase the title without understanding the responsibility.

I Hope He Learns That Being the Boss Does Not Make You Better Than Anyone Else

Titles can do strange things to people.

Founder.

CEO.

Owner.

Those words can become identities.

I do not want him impressed by titles alone.

I want him impressed by:

Integrity.

Competence.

Character.

How someone treats people.

How they behave when things go wrong.

Those matter more.

I Hope He Learns to Build People, Not Just Things

Some of the most meaningful parts of my career have come from watching other people grow.

Students.

Employees.

Providers.

People who started unsure and became capable.

A business can create:

Revenue.

Assets.

But it can also create opportunities for people.

I want him to understand that success becomes much more meaningful when your growth helps someone else grow too.

I Hope He Learns to Share What He Knows

Knowledge becomes more valuable when it is shared.

Teach someone.

Mentor someone.

Answer the question.

Make the introduction.

Share the lesson you learned the expensive way.

Not everything needs to be protected like a secret.

Sometimes helping someone else move faster does not take anything away from you.

I Hope He Learns That Competition Is Not the Only Way to Look at Other People's Success

Someone else doing well does not automatically mean you are losing.

I hope he can admire.

Learn.

Collaborate.

Support.

There will always be people ahead of you in some category.

There will always be people behind you.

Neither determines your worth.

I Hope He Learns to Support Small Businesses

I understand small businesses differently now.

When I walk into one, I see more than the product.

I think about:

The person who took the risk.

The rent.

The payroll.

The inventory.

The nights they wondered whether it would work.

I hope he sees that too.

Supporting a small business can mean supporting a family.

A dream.

A job.

Someone's attempt to create something.

I Hope He Learns That People Are More Important Than Transactions

Business can make everything feel measurable.

Revenue.

Conversion.

Productivity.

Profit.

But clients are still people.

Employees are people.

Students are people.

Relationships matter.

I want him to understand numbers without allowing numbers to erase humanity.

I Hope He Learns That Reputation Compounds

The way you behave today becomes part of what people believe about you tomorrow.

Keep your word.

Do good work.

Admit mistakes.

Treat people well.

Do not manipulate.

Do not lie because it is convenient.

A good reputation takes years to build.

It can open doors you never expected.

Protect it.

I Hope He Learns That Your Name Should Mean Something

Not fame.

Character.

If someone hears his name one day, I hope the associations are:

He is reliable.

He is kind.

He is smart.

He follows through.

He works hard.

He is fair.

He can be trusted.

That is a brand worth building.

I Hope He Learns to Understand His Own Worth

I do not want him to measure himself entirely by:

Grades.

Money.

Career.

Followers.

Titles.

Awards.

Those things can tell you something.

They cannot tell you who you are.

I hope he knows his value before the world starts assigning numbers to him.

I Hope He Learns That Money Cannot Fix Every Problem

Money helps.

I will never pretend otherwise.

Financial security reduces many kinds of stress.

But money cannot manufacture:

Character.

Trust.

Health.

Good relationships.

Presence.

Peace.

I want him to understand what money is good for without expecting it to solve things it cannot.

I Hope He Learns to Choose the Life Behind the Success

This is one of the biggest lessons motherhood has taught me.

A decision can look incredible on paper.

But what does the life around it look like?

Maybe the bigger business means:

No time.

No sleep.

Constant stress.

No flexibility.

Maybe the slightly smaller one creates:

Enough money.

More freedom.

More presence.

Which one is actually more successful?

I want him to think about the life behind the achievement.

I Hope He Learns That Bigger Is Not Always Better

Bigger house.

Bigger company.

Bigger title.

Bigger income.

More is easy to measure.

Better is harder.

Sometimes better means:

Simpler.

More profitable.

More flexible.

More meaningful.

I want him to know that he does not have to spend his life constantly enlarging it.

I Hope He Learns to Know When Enough Is Enough

This may be one of the hardest lessons.

There will always be:

More money.

More status.

More achievement.

More goals.

If you never decide what enough means, you can spend your entire life chasing a finish line that moves every time you reach it.

I am still learning this myself.

I hope he learns it earlier.

I Hope He Learns to Be Ambitious for the Right Reasons

I want him to want things.

Set goals.

Push himself.

But I hope the motivation comes from:

Curiosity.

Purpose.

Responsibility.

A desire to build.

Not only:

Proving something.

Impressing people.

Beating everyone.

The why behind ambition matters.

I Hope He Learns That Success Is Not a Competition With His Friends

There will be people who:

Earn more.

Start younger.

Buy the house first.

Get promoted faster.

Build bigger businesses.

Comparison can turn a good life into one that never feels good enough.

I hope he can celebrate other people's timing without distrusting his own.

I Hope He Learns to Protect His Attention

I think attention will become one of the most valuable resources of his generation.

Everyone wants it.

Phones.

Apps.

Companies.

Work.

People.

I have learned through motherhood how much attention matters.

I hope he learns to choose where his goes.

I Hope He Remembers That Being Present Is a Skill

This is something he is teaching me.

It is possible to be in the room without really being there.

I hope he learns to:

Put the phone down.

Listen.

Notice.

Make eye contact.

Be where he is.

There will always be more work.

There will not always be another moment exactly like this one.

I Hope He Learns That Family Needs Time, Not Just Provision

I work partly because I want to provide.

But I know provision alone is not the same thing as parenting.

Children need:

Time.

Love.

Attention.

Consistency.

I hope when he is older, he understands that success includes taking care of the people you love in more ways than financially.

I Hope He Understands Why I Worked So Hard

One day, I hope he looks back and understands.

I was trying to create:

Security.

Choices.

A future.

A business.

A life.

I wanted him to see what was possible.

But I also hope he knows something else.

I Hope He Knows I Would Choose Him Over the Business

Every time.

The businesses matter.

My work matters.

My goals matter.

But they are things I built.

He is my son.

There is no comparison.

I hope I never become so consumed by work that he has to wonder which mattered more.

I Hope He Remembers the Small Things

Not the launch.

Not the revenue year.

Not the new location.

Maybe he will remember some of those things.

But I hope he remembers:

Pizza.

The playground.

Birthdays.

Conversations.

Being silly.

The times I showed up.

The things that looked small to everyone else.

Those may become the biggest things to him.

I Hope He Sees That I Kept Trying to Get Better

I will not be a perfect mother.

I am not a perfect business owner.

I have made mistakes in both roles.

What I hope he sees is that I tried to notice.

Learn.

Apologize.

Adjust.

That may be one of the best things any parent can model.

You do not need perfection to improve.

I Hope He Learns That Strong People Ask for Help

I do not want him to believe independence means doing everything alone.

That is not how I built anything.

People helped me.

Employees.

Teachers.

Family.

Professionals.

Friends.

I have needed advice.

Support.

Childcare.

Expertise.

There is strength in recognizing what you cannot or should not do alone.

I Hope He Learns to Choose Good People

This matters in:

Friendships.

Relationships.

Business.

Who you surround yourself with can change your life.

Choose people who:

Tell you the truth.

Want good things for you.

Respect boundaries.

Show up.

Challenge you appropriately.

Do not confuse charisma with character.

I Hope He Learns Not to Stay Where He Is Repeatedly Disrespected

Loyalty is good.

Endurance is good.

But neither requires accepting everything.

Sometimes you leave.

A job.

A business relationship.

A friendship.

A situation.

I hope he is strong enough to recognize when staying is costing too much of himself.

I Hope He Learns That He Can Start Over

This is such an important lesson.

A wrong decision does not mean the rest of your life is wrong.

You can:

Change careers.

Move.

Rebuild.

Learn something new.

End something.

Start something.

I hope he never feels trapped simply because he already invested time.

I Hope He Learns That His Life Does Not Have to Look Like Mine

Maybe he becomes an entrepreneur.

Maybe he does not.

I do not care.

I do not need him to build a company because I did.

Maybe he becomes:

A teacher.

An artist.

A doctor.

An engineer.

A programmer.

A parent.

Something none of us can imagine yet.

I want him to build his life.

Not recreate mine.

I Hope He Learns That a Job Can Be a Wonderful Life

Entrepreneurship gets romanticized.

There is nothing wrong with employment.

There is nothing wrong with wanting:

Stability.

A paycheck.

Benefits.

Predictable hours.

Not everyone needs to be an entrepreneur.

I want him to choose based on what fits him.

Not because his mother built businesses.

I Hope He Learns That Entrepreneurship Is a Choice, Not a Status Symbol

Being an entrepreneur does not make someone more important.

It is one way to earn a living and create things.

It carries:

Opportunity.

Risk.

Responsibility.

There are incredible employees.

Terrible entrepreneurs.

And everything between.

Character matters more than job title.

I Hope He Learns That Work Should Support a Life

Not replace it.

This may be the biggest lesson I am trying to learn while he watches.

Your work should ideally help create:

Security.

Freedom.

Meaning.

Opportunity.

But there should still be:

People you love.

Things you enjoy.

A life outside of productivity.

If work consumes everything it was meant to support, something has gone wrong.

I Hope He Learns to Be Proud Without Needing to Be Better Than Anyone Else

I want him to be proud of what he builds.

Not arrogant.

Proud.

There is nothing wrong with saying:

I worked hard for this.

I am proud of myself.

You can be proud and humble at the same time.

I Hope He Learns Gratitude Without Losing Ambition

This balance matters to me.

You can be grateful for what you have.

And still want more.

Gratitude does not require stagnation.

Ambition does not require dissatisfaction.

I hope he can hold both.

I Hope He Learns That Life Is Allowed to Change

What you want at:

20

may not be what you want at:

Or 40.

Success can change.

Priorities can change.

I want him to give himself permission to evolve.

I Hope He Learns That Fatherhood Should Not Make Him Less Ambitious Either

I talk a lot about motherhood because that is my experience.

But I hope when he becomes an adult, he understands something important.

If he becomes a father, raising his children should be part of his life too.

Not something his partner quietly carries while he pursues everything else.

I hope he learns that:

Presence.

Childcare.

School events.

Emotional labor.

Household responsibility.

Belong to fathers too.

I want him to be an equal participant in the life he chooses to build with someone.

I Hope Watching His Mother Work Makes Him a Better Partner One Day

I hope he sees how much work goes into:

A career.

A home.

A family.

I hope he respects the ambitions of the person he eventually loves.

I hope he never assumes her goals matter less because she becomes a mother.

I hope he understands that supporting someone else's success is not a threat to his own.

That may be one of the most meaningful things I can teach him as his mother.

I Hope He Chooses Someone Who Supports Him Too

Relationships should not be one person disappearing into another person's ambitions.

I hope he builds a partnership where both people can grow.

Where both people's work matters.

Where both people's time matters.

Where both people carry the life they create together.

I Hope He Learns That Love Is Also Work

Not business work.

Relationship work.

Showing up.

Listening.

Remembering.

Repairing.

Helping.

Being patient.

Love is not only how you feel.

It is often what you consistently do.

What I Hope He Remembers About Me

I hope he remembers that I worked hard.

But not only that.

I hope he remembers that I laughed with him.

That I listened.

That I showed up.

That I tried.

That I made mistakes and apologized.

That I loved what I did.

And loved him infinitely more.

I hope he is proud of the businesses I built.

But I hope he is prouder of the person he believes I was.

That matters much more to me.

One Day He May Understand the Parts He Cannot See Yet

Right now, he sees Mom working.

One day, he may understand what was behind it.

The fear.

The responsibility.

The financial pressure.

The decisions.

The risks.

The desire to create something.

The constant attempt to balance building a future with not missing the present.

Maybe one day he will understand that a lot of what looked like ambition was also love.

Not perfect love.

Not perfectly executed.

But love.

And If He Learns Nothing About Business From Me...

That is okay.

If he learns:

To be kind.

To work hard.

To respect women.

To understand money.

To take responsibility.

To ask questions.

To think for himself.

To admit when he is wrong.

To protect the people he loves.

To build a life he actually wants.

To know when enough is enough.

To be present.

Then I will consider that a much bigger accomplishment than anything I ever put my name on.

The Legacy I Actually Care About

There are many things people can leave behind.

A business.

Money.

A building.

Books.

A name.

Those things can matter.

But the legacy I think about most is much closer to home.

What kind of man will my son become?

What did he learn from watching me?

Did my work teach him that life is only about achievement?

Or did he see something fuller?

Ambition.

Responsibility.

Love.

Failure.

Growth.

Family.

Perspective.

I hope he saw all of it.

Because I am not only building businesses while he watches.

I am helping shape the way he understands adulthood.

That may be the most important thing I am building at all.

— Erica Roybal

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